Wednesday, 18 May 2016

Modern Love with Children (a texting story)

Fourteen Years ago we were married. It was the best decision I have ever made. Through the chaos of life, we keep connected through texts, because technology is romance.

 When you just send each other links to articles. So much of this. Nothing says, "I love you," like a hyperlink.

 Sometimes we send each other photos of the children. We make the most attractive babies. 

 Some nights you have to work and don't have time to speak in person, so you boss your partner around through texts. He is too busy to answer. Obviously this means 100% compliance has been achieved.

 Little updates throughout the day.

As you can see, a lot of our communication revolves around the children. I don't know if you have encountered this, but children are all consuming. They have so much energy because they syphon it out of their parents like tiny gasoline thieves (thanks for sending me that quote Jessica, I reference it ALL THE TIME- it even hangs on my fridge as an oppressive reminder). I don't know what we talked about for the first 12 years of our relationship. I can't remember.

I thought she was asking me if Danielle had an I or a Y, I said I, and now my Starbuck's name is Tania. My sister-in-law taught me about Starbucks names, and I am so glad that I finally have mine. Obviously, when your Starbucks name chooses you, you must alert your Dearest. Romance 101.

When he just gets you.

When he knows exactly what to say.

More with the kids. Texting is amazing because (if your ringer is off), it is silent. This is imperative if you are attempting to force children to nap.

When he comes to you with his queries. 

...this pocket is definitely too low.

When you discuss doughnut murder then suddenly become very formal.

When you share your children's accomplishments.
Pictured: toilet paper wadded up with water and thrown onto the bathroom ceiling

Sometimes you just send out a warning. WARNING.

When the articulateness of your exchange becomes incredible. Is there anything more romantic than accuracy of language? Nothing I can think of. And I don't want to live in a world where sandwiches don't exist.

Now you know all our secrets. Try some of these tactics on your Love, you won't regret it. This level of glamour is worth the effort. If you are on the search for a Love, these might be just the wooing stratagem you have been seeking. Let me know how it goes! I adore a love story!

All love stories are beautiful, but I like ours the best (I must have read that on Pinterest somewhere). To my best friend, this is the truth. I love our adventure together. It's my favourite. Happy Anniversary! I recorded our song. You are safe and sound with me, always. I love you! 

Safe and Sound - click to listen

Safe and Sound
by, Hawksley Workman (thank you for writing this song, I love it so much)

You slept through the last small town
I'll wake you up when the next one comes around
You're eyes are closed, like you truly believe
You're safe and sound with me

No looking back, no turning into salt,
The city was crumbling but baby we're not to fault
When things got too rough, I promised you we'd leave
You're safe and sound with me

You're safe and sound with me- yeah -ah -ah -ah
Just like you always will
Just like you always will be

The wipers clear the windshield of the rain
My shirt sleeve dries your eyes the very same
We fit together like the ignition and the key
You're safe and sound with me

You're safe and sound with me -yeah -ah -ah -ah
Just like you always will
Just like you always will be

The glove box light shines bright enough to see
You read the map like you're reading poetry
And it just might take you forever to see
That you're safe and sound with me


  1. Hilarious! Dad isn't missing out on a thing and is probably glad when he is NOT there. Texting only works if you are both verbose and clever. Not everyone is! Fun stuff. The bathroom ceiling was a hoot.

  2. You two are the best, way to keep it real in the parent world. Happy anniversary!